Most people speak about trauma as if it’s a thing that happens to you. It’s not.
Experiences you have only store as trauma when your subconscious doesn’t have the inner resourcefulness to process the things that happen *and* you don’t have outer support/resources that help you process.
When you are equipped with the inner resourcefulness/outer resources to process even the most gnarly of experiences on a psyche, soma, heArt level… you can process the Bigness of the happenings in real time and it doesn’t need to store as a big wounded ugly (a trauma) in your subconscious.
When you are *not* equipped with the inner resourcefulness/outer resources to process happenings in real time… your psyche, soma, heArt will contract, repress, shut down, utilize well-patterned defense mechanisms to navigate and survive, and the experiences become stored as trauma—the untouchable, unconscious Wound that hijacks you.
This is why childhood can be so deeply traumatizing. With limited inner resourcefulness to process experiences, little ones continually turn to their caretakers as the outer resource and when not adequately supported (or when the caretaker is the source of the harm) develop smart AF defense mechanisms to survive and maneuver life. Which molds your subconscious/who you are by default as an adult. Unless you choose to look at, process, and transform yourself.
So. The experiences I had in 2023 rocked me to my core. I wept from the depths of my soul. I felt the rage of generations of women pour through my body. I didn’t bypass any of it, it was fkn gnarly, but I had a lot of inner resourcefulness to turn to and epic support for the moments I hit my limits. Which is why I wasn’t traumatized. I was transformed. For the better.
The core of everything I teach is — Life isn’t Defined by what happens to you, but rather Designed by what you make of every happening.
This is the power of conscious, creative choice. It’s not just – “I don’t entertain that, I choose something different.” It’s actually – “I’m willing to see and feel and know and hold It All… and simultaneously choose what I make of It All.”
That is true high level, heArt-driven leadership. 🎨❤️🔥💎🪞
Instagram post here